Wednesday Wonderin's

Questions, questions....

1. If Little Caesar's Dog food comes in filet mignon, why aren't people eating it?
2. Does my dog care if it was ground beef or filet mignon when cat shit is nirvana?
3. Why am I so fascinated with the t.v. show Extreme Makeover when all I do throughout the show is fantasize about what I would get done to myself????
4. Why does the papparazzi insist upon following people like Mischa Barton (who the hell is she?) and Nicole "anorexic-skinny ass" Richey? Does someone out there care about these people???
5. Same question...insert the name Paris Hilton. What has this girl done to deserve the attention she receives?
6. Since I am in the schools a lot lately, I have noticed that there are some teacher's out there in need of a fashion intervention. To the lady I saw yesterday - that shapeless bag you were wearing as a "dress" did nothing for you. In fact, that artful way one fabric was used on the bodice and another on the skirt made me do a double take and wonder if you had a towel wrapped around your waist! Okay - that wasn't a question. Wait! Why teacher-lady? Why???

This was in my backyard the other day. Sent the hubs an email with the picture and a subject heading "woody". He then emailed me back, "what if I went into my next meeting and told them my wife just sent me a photo of a woody in the backyard?" To which I responded, "you notice I stayed away from the word "pecker."

Your Usual Tuesday

I know, I know I go on and on about what irritates me but good gracious, there are sooooo many things to choose from! Here is just the latest....

We ordered something for the new house. It is coming in two shipments and we get a phone call that because no one could take delivery at the new house it was returned. Well, duh. Its a new house. As in unfinished and nobody lives there yet.

Now, the place just called me and she wants me to basically promise to not leave my house on the day that the freight place is going to deliver these beams.

me: I can't say that I will be home all that day.
her: Well, we need someone to accept delivery.
me: Who stays home all day long anymore? How do you get anyone to agree to this?
her: We usually don't have any problem.
me: Who are these people??? I can tell you right now that I am probably almost the only person home on my STREET!
her: So, will someone be there?
me: you can call and I will do the best that I can. That's all I can promise. If they will give me an approximate time than I will try.

When I am working I CAN NOT leave. I am up in front of 700 kids. Its not like I can just say, "hang on while I run home and take delivery of my beams!"

Almost as irritating as the previous phone call (yes, I have caller i.d. but they are getting sneakier. This one showed an out of state area code.)

caller: May I speak to the man of the house? (that right there pissed me off)
me: no
caller: This is such-n-such media survey company. When would be a good time to call him?
me: Never. take us off your list. CLICK.

Other than that, the weather is grand and life is good.

We have COLOR!

Since the house has taken over my life here lately (thanks to my husband who had to gallivant, er, I mean work, in Denmark and Croatia for the last 10 days!) leaving me as the Go-To Gal for the builder.

Some house photos. Here is the stone and uncolored stucco. The stucco will be a golden beige color (Hear that? As in NO PINK, Mr. Stucco man! Unlike the first sample you brought me)







Let me introduce you to the view of my great room and dining room. The colors are Branchport Brown (trim) and Decatur Buff (walls) all from Benjamin Moore. You see why I was a little trepidacious about my color choices. But, I love how it turned out.

The stacked boxes are the slate style tile that is getting put in as I type this now.


Here is a view of part of the kitchen from the great room. The walls in there are Timothy Straw (a pale olivey green).

The guys who do the texture need to come back and do that one spot. So the paint dudes can finish. If paint dudes can remember where I live. We came in when they were painting and these guys faces were smothered in paint. No MASKS. Just all fumes, all the time. That has got to effect your brain cells.

Well, gotta go by the place and give the tile guys my soap dishes and such for the bathrooms. We are maybe 3 weeks away from moving in.

Oh yeah??? Crazy stalker buyer??? She bailed. Here in Texas you can put a contract to purchase on a house and only lose $100 if you change your mind within 10 days. Her mortgage lender said she had to sell her existing home to qualify for mine so she bailed. I am back on the market AGAIN.

Its 3 am

Hello? Yeah, I can't sleep. Just thought I would update with a few pics and observations. I'm not back yet, just coming up to the surface for a breath of fresh air.

Infantry graduation was awesome. Watching these young men made me appreciate my freedom and how we live here even more.

This picture is right after I pinned his blue cord on his right shoulder, then I grabbed a hold of him and wouldn't let go. I hadn't seen him in 14 WEEKS! After an intervention with the Jaws of Life graduation ceremonies were able to commence once again.

The House? It is moving right along. But let's back up. The house we are living in sold in the first showing. That Buyer? Ended up being CRAZY. So, we were back on the market. I have a contract again now and keeping my fingers crossed that this buyer doesn't go bananas. She is scaring me a little. She showed up on Saturday unannounced to show the house to her sister and I got that creepy feeling. You know when you can tell someone is going to stalk you? She is hugging me and acting like we are going to be best friends.

The new house: they are just finishing the stone and stucco on the front, stained and varnished the kitchen cabinetry and installed the countertops. The interior painters should be arriving any day and then we can see if my paint selections are good....or not.

New job? I love it. I was one of those people who during a Karaoke party would be like "Oh no, I would never do that!" but then once my hands touched the microphone? Good luck getting it back. I am the prize lady. I go to the schools and show the kids what they can win if they sell a lot of whatever it is (cookie dough, wrapping paper etc.). Yes, I know you parents are saying "I hate that when my kid comes home and is convinced he will be the one to selling $1,000,000,000 worth of cookie dough and will win the ballpoint pen. THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM, PEOPLE. I whip them up into a frenzy and then send them back to class. And, I do it well. So well, that my new boss DOUBLED MY SALARY after the first week!

PTO? Keeping me busier than I thought it would. Start of school, membership kick off, parent orientation nights etc.etc.

Here is an observation (one of many I have wanted to share). Old men should not be allowed out in a public place. More importantly, the post office. You know those automated kiosks to mail a package? I could win a race working one of those things. I had a man in front of me yesterday that I thought I was going to have to knock him out of the way and just do it for him. Luckily, a nice postal (oxymoron???) employee helped him.

"Want to mail a package, sir?"

"Uh, well, where did my wife go? I need to mail this box."

"That would be a yes then?"

You can imagine the rest. He actually read the fine print that states something about does your package contain explosive devices or flesh eating acid.

Peace out - Be well!