Thursday, December 15, 2005

Snoop Deb

No, don't think Snoop Dog with that catchy title though it is all the Shizzle. I have spent a lot of time here lately in my vehicle thus listening to the radio. Today's topic: Have you ever snooped on your man? The DJ's were talking to women who had snooped on their menfolk. The one check his cell phone camera and found a very interesting picture that lead to quite a lively discussion.

I am not a snoopy person by nature. I am probably more a "don't want to know" more than a "know at all costs." But, go back with me, back about 16 1/2 years ago or so. I was married before. I earned the Prince Charming I am married to now and have the scars to prove it.

Not only did I have to snoop I practically had the whole pipe, cape and Watson thing down. This guy was pretty incredible. Too long to go into the whole story now but let me give you a tiny piece, an appetizer if you will.

We were poor. Dirt poor. Like after paying the bills I would seriously have $5 left over for the whole week. I didn't eat out for lunch, I didn't buy sodas. I had an American Express card in my name only cuz lets just say the guy had credit issues.

He comes to me one time and asks me for my American Express card number. Says he wants to buy me something and has to order it with a credit card. I am feeling slightly suspicious (due to some other $$ issues that had happened a couple years previous) but go ahead cuz I was flattered. The man wanted to buy me something and what woman doesn't love that?? Of course, I gave him the warning to not spend very much. I wait and wait and wait. Nothing arrives, no gift. Of course, I am too polite to say "Hey, where's my present?" so say nothing. Then the bill arrives. There is an $80 charge to a floral shop! I am freaking on the inside wondering what the hell to do. I call the store. I ask the girl to kindly tell me what was purchased with my card. She says all snotty, "Ma'm its your husband, why don't you just ask him?" That's when my high and mighty, I will put the smackdown on you ho voice rolled on out. She was eager to please once she heard the Wrath of Debbie. It was my damn credit card and my definately my freakin' business!

It was a dozen roses and they were sent to his coworker.

Needless to say, that was one marriage down the drain. Yes, we could argue just how stupid he was but the arguement here is snooping. I snooped when I had to. I don't snoop through my kids backpacks, my husband's wallet or anything else. But I can be a hell of a Nancy Drew when pushed.


  • My ex was so stupid, I didn't have to snoop hard to find things. Once, while doing the laundry, I found a piece of paper in his pants pocket with a phone number and a girl's name on it. He said it was the phone number of a girl his BROTHER wanted to go out with, and he forgot to give the number to his brother. I called his brother's girlfriend and gave it to HER. I could go on and on and on, girlfriend!

    By Blogger Vanessa, at 12/15/2005 9:20 PM  

  • Ugh. I think we should test them and then castrate the ones that are prone to fail us. I once dated a guy who borrowed my car frequently to run errands. Right there you can feel my naiveness kicking in. As it turned out, he had a WIFE who he was estranged from. He used my car to visit her while trying to reconcile their differences. It still makes me ill.

    By Blogger Tink, at 12/16/2005 10:39 AM  

  • I've never had to do that with the guy I married...Mr. Everything. However, I did hone those skills with a pathological liar I once dated. Talk about an education! Skepticism is a handy street skill, Deb. I'm glad things are better for you.

    By Blogger wordgirl, at 12/16/2005 11:38 AM  

  • I also dated a pathological liar. I think once you've gotten to the point where you are going to already no the answer. Time to move on.

    By Blogger Shrinking Violet, at 12/17/2005 9:31 AM  

  • Debbie I think you're still a snoop virgin. Because hey, it's your freakin' credit card and it was supposedly your freakin' gift. Now there may be a fine line between snooping and "checking", but you weren't even near it. And please can I borrow your smackdown voice sometimes? I have a tendency to try to win people over when they're rude to me. I hate that.

    By Blogger Mignon, at 12/17/2005 3:21 PM  

  • I wish I would have done a little more snooping in my first marriage. I could've saved myself a couple of years and a lot of therapy.

    By Anonymous TB, at 12/17/2005 4:27 PM  

  • Oooo weee do I understand!

    I had an ex-boyfriend who borrowed BOTH my car AND my credit card to take other women to dinner.

    And I wondered why we couldn't just break up. But he was no dummy...with THAT gravy train???

    "I earned the Prince Charming I am married to now and have the scars to prove it." Well put!!

    By Blogger Brooke, at 12/18/2005 8:42 AM  

  • What an SOB, thank God he was stupid! I am not sure what I would have done, but I am sure it would not have been pretty.

    By Blogger Ditsy Chick, at 12/19/2005 3:35 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home