Saturday, June 28, 2008

Not Sanctioned by Miss Post

I haven't actually reached an age where I can truly say, "I think I've seen everything" but something happened this week that makes me want to spew that cliche.

My 15 year old son received an invitation in the mail. To A Baby Shower. FOR A GIRL IN HIS CLASS.

No - he doesn't know her that well (and certainly not THAT well, as in the biblical sense!) and he doesn't even consider her a friend.

I was simply stunned that anyone was celebrating this child being pregnant. I knew about the pregnancy months ago and was shocked like everyone else. She seems like a "good girl" and all that. Cute, outgoing, good family. This was an oops. A Juno moment.

I believe this type of situation should be handled delicately. We can all love that baby when it gets here and of course, it will be just as special and valued as any other child. But, whilst the daughter is preggers I don't think its appropriate for her to take the ultrasound shots to school. And, I don't think its appropriate to invite 9th grade boys (who think the whole thing is gross and disgusting - or at least the one who lives in my household does) to a baby shower.

In addition, much to Miss Emily Post's dismay, the shower is being hosted by THE MOTHER/SOON -TO- BE -GRANDMOTHER, which for those who are not up on all things etiquette is gauche. Please do not bombard me with comments about "how things are changing" because you see, I DON'T CARE. I don't care what anyone says about "men being in the delivery room blah, blah, blah." I think a baby shower for couples is great. Let's assume everyone is at least of voting age, if not drinking, shall we???? My son is not. Good grief! He can't even drive. He's not going to be thrilled to play shower games or ooh and aaah over burp rags and diaper genies.

I believe that our society has lost its sense of shame. And, I for one, find that a real shame.


  • I have a problem with parents who let their children keep children. There are plenty of parents out there who would love to have a baby but can't. Why in the world do 15 year olds think they need a baby? Or that their life won't change in the least. And what kind of parent doesn't tell that kind, "This is what you are going to do!"


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6/28/2008 8:01 PM  

  • Oh my. Yeah, I think that one would bother me as well. I grew up in a small town and a several girls ended up walking down the graduation aisle pregnant each year. And, a few had the same attitude as this family must--we can't stop it, so let's celebrate it.

    I grew up with a parent who basically put it in my head that it was the end of the world if you got pregnant before you were out of school. Now, while I don't believe that and I think a young mom could still go on to success, I think that it is a real hardship, and a bit of an embarassement (especially at 15!), and definitely not something you should be waving around proudly. That's really gross...

    By Blogger Crazy MomCat, at 6/28/2008 9:05 PM  

  • Totally wrong. I just don't have the words as to how wrong this is. I just can't imagine. Birthday parties are one thing.... to invite boys to, but a BABY SHOWER! Yikes. That parent is wacko. Just wrong.

    By Blogger Brenda, at 6/28/2008 9:15 PM  

  • That is so sad that a 15 y.o. is pregnant, and then that she's having a party, and inviting boys? I thought I was pretty forward-thinking and liberal minded but I had to put my foot down when my son was invited to a co-ed slumber party! Are parents on crack these days? I didn't think I was THAT old.

    By Anonymous Trish, at 6/29/2008 11:14 AM  

  • I don't think anyone needs to be throwing her a shower, to be quite honest. And I don't think her 15 y.o female peers have any business being invited...let alone the boys. It's too easy to glamorize the event with tiny clothes and toys. Speaking of which, to petition other children to attend a shower you're giving for your daughter is nothing short of panhandling.

    By Anonymous apathy lounge, at 6/29/2008 10:17 PM  

  • OMG..a baby shower for a 15 year old?

    You guys don't by chance live in Gloucester, MA do you? Did you hear about that group of teenage girls all getting pregnant en masse?

    By Blogger teahouse, at 6/30/2008 12:24 AM  

  • Ugh. That just makes my stomach turn. What is that girl's Mother thinking?!

    By Blogger Tink, at 6/30/2008 7:31 AM  

  • Geez Louise...

    By Blogger Pendullum, at 7/04/2008 8:40 AM  

  • The shower is wrong. Inviting BOYS is even worse.

    This a time to lend support, not to celebrate blithely.

    I do think, though, that no girl should be forced to give a baby up. I've known women who have made both choices--it is being stuck between a rock and a hard place. One of my closest friends adopted a child offered for adoption by a 15-year-old in Illinois. Another gave a child up in an open adoption and has to witness her child's life from a distance and not get involved. The family that adopted her is troubled at the moment, a divorce in the works, and my friend has to live with the knowledge that she was trying to save her daughter from a single parent home and her daughter was going to land there anyway. It's hard. It's always hard...

    By Anonymous V-Grrrl, at 7/09/2008 11:31 AM  

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